Ah, well, we have all kinds of things to talk about. And I know the thing you want me to talk about the most is the new nickname, the new forever name that has been assigned by the nicknamer in chief, President Trump. This one belongs to Adam Schiff. If you haven't seen it already, the president has given him the name of Little Adam Schitt.

Let me look at the tweet that Adam Schiff did in response, because it's a great one. And every news source is covering it. This could not be funnier. All right, I was looking for his response but I don't want to look for it while on the air. It's everywhere. Shut up.

So let's talk about how good a nickname it is. Now first of all, I like the fact that it left a small doubt, a very small sliver of doubt, a barely existing doubt about whether it was just a typo, because T and F are not so far apart on the keyboard. But I don't think any of us believe it was a typo, do we? Had it been a typo he might have taken down the tweet, but no, it is not a typo. It is the new name for Adam Schiff.

And here's the part I like best about it. You know that sooner or later the president is going to be talking about Adam Schiff in public. And I'm waiting to see how he pronounces it. Now he's not going to pronounce it in public the profane way. So the president of the United States, even though he tweeted it, is very unlikely to say the word out loud. I would say it's possible. You know, anything's possible. But probably not. He'll say it out loud.

What will be funny is the way he approaches pronouncing it. Can you imagine him at the rally? You know, his next rally. I don't know if he's going to have any more rallies anytime soon. But imagine him saying, "And then we hear from Representative Adam Schiff." And then the crowd goes wild. Because when he says Schiff with an FF as in Frank, he's going to say it with just a slightly different pause, just a little bit of emphasis on the last name, a little bit of a wink. And the entire crowd is going to hear a different word. The entire crowd and everybody who sees it on TV is going to translate it in their mind. And it's going to be freaking hilarious. They might start chanting. I don't know if there's a chant for this yet. But the president set up this situation where it might be the world's longest and biggest joke with a punchline. Like we're waiting for the punchline. The punchline hasn't come yet.

You think that was the joke, right? You think the joke was that he spelled it with the TT and we're all laughing about that. Oh no, that's not the joke. The joke is next time he says Schiff in public and the entire crowd will go nuts. That's the joke. That's the punchline. So personally I can't wait. If you hear that the president's giving any kind of a speech and you think something might come up about Schiff and Schiff's criticism, stop what you're doing. Stop what you're doing. Turn on the TV. Find a way to watch it on the internet. You're going to have to watch him deliver the best setup joke of all time. Because he's just going to say the name regular: Little Adam Schiff. The crowd goes wild. It's going to be epic.